Dear Dr. Manmohan Singh, I formally welcome you to your orientation as the prime minister of the Republic of India. I understand that you have not just assumed office, but surprisingly, have been at the helm for more than 7 years now. Therefore, as the famous maxim goes- Better late than never, we have decided to conduct an orientation for you to bring you up to speed with the fabrics of Indian democracy and parliamentary system. Well maybe we can leave out the latter, since that is all you and your cabinet seem to be adept at. But in our deliberations, we have concluded that it is of utmost importance that you also take some time out from your frantic consultations with Rahul baba to refresh your class 9th History & Civics.
Let's get started. So dear PM, it seems that you believe anything can only be done efficiently if it is completed in a time bound manner. Of course, your well grounded research of macroeconomic theory and your time at the helm of the Reserve bank of India can be attributed to have led you to this cementing of principles. Unfortunately, economics seems not to work that well in real life, as is evident from the runaway inflation plaguing the country at this moment. You also want to abrogate any attempts to impose pre-conditions on others, especially those who intend no harm to the country and are simply exercising their rights. You remember a certain man known as Mahatma Gandhi? He did it all the time, and the british, as gentlemanly as they were, never resorted to anything more than to arrest him and his followers. Yes sir, that is your government's prerogative, though you might want to balance it out considering we are an independent nation now.
Also, when you say that it is the parliament's prerogative to formulate policies and draft laws, you could not be more correct. But dear sir, as you must have been trained to do in your days as a grad student, you need to incorporate ideas to make them more effective. Your version of the Lokpal bill appears to be a portmanteau of what Raja would like and what Anna would dislike. You can't possibly be taking on two strong personalities, one who loves to taint his cabinet and the other who loves to serve his country. That is simply bad PR! And also, when you are giving important speeches, for example the national address, you must understand that you are not sitting in an auditorium of 50 people, all over 60, who came to discuss some deep lemma in the Keynesian model of economics. You need to show that you are the man in the driver's seat. For reference, check out Atal Bihari Vajpayee's speech on the Kargil war. You'll understand what I am talking about. And please, don't be shy of the media. They've made your party men stars, there is no reason you should allow your generosity to encompass the PM-public contact.
I hope that this session has been fruitful. The next session will be on how to keep a leash on the disruptive elements in your party, who like to have their foot in their mouth all the time!
Peace out.
PS: Arun jaitley shows Abhishek Manu Singhvi who's the boss.
1 comment:
very well written siddhu
our pm looks like a man who is so disinterested in his job that he nearly looks debilitated.
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