The boyhood dream

When I was growing up, my bucket-list was checkered with assortments like: An imposing degree, a fat pay cheque, great friends, and a good-looking girl. Over years, these dreams went through a see-saw of hope and despair, of conviction and blind-faith, of emotions and delusions. The boyhood dream seemed to be a reality, and yet too good to be true. In the meantime, the grindstone was conquered (sort of), a boy left his home, on a new journey to an alien city. They say that the ride is worth it, yet, Alexander wasn't happy about returning from India rendered helpless in spirit, Tendulkar would not cherish the 2003 WC like he would the recent edition, and Yuri Gagarin would remember his space odyssey more than the test missions. I am no great man, so I'll keep these as parameters to measure my own journey. The boyhood dream shaped up like this: A degree very few outside IIT know of or understand, subsistence stipend at grad school/a good salary, great friends, and misadventures in the female department. Great friends it is that turned into a reality.

Yet, the invectives in the air and investigative reports on an affair in class 11th seem confounding, almost too good to be true. Yet, they have become the backbone of a valfi profile, one read out in our moment in the limelight, our valedictory function. In other words, here is what a stereotypical valfi profile algorithm looks like:

a) A colorful description of the victim's mother's labor and how abhorring it was

b) How the victim was a nerd in school and could only stare at girls from a corner (sure, girls would do the same at times)

c) How this hasn't changed even though he/she is at IIT

d) How he/she summed up courage and made a pass at their crush of yore

e) How it was an unsuccessful attempt and became a point of ridicule

f) Choicest abuses to cap it off

This was never a part of the boyhood dream. This wasn't a part of any dream at all! Sure, even though it is done in a friendly manner and with the sincerest of intentions to assassinate the victim's character, it leaves me amazed at why a person would want to go out on a ride of shame when he/she could do much more in the final days at his/her second home. Valfis constitute an important part of our life at IIT, it is almost incomplete without it. The tradition, as they say, was meant to offer a counter-view to the victim's perceived image. In other words, it was meant to take him/her to the bare beginnings, when there were no PORs, no studapa, no grand-standing exploits in foreign land. And this is the only level where it is successful.

What valfis succeed in is making us realize the boyhood dream once more. Once more, take us back to that aura of ignorance at what life ahead would be like, how destiny would unfold and leave us amazed at our own capabilities. For 4/5 years, we toil hard, scrape at the bottom in order to come out on top at something, do our best to become a part of a second family. In this ride, the bargain involves shedding some of that naivete and embracing selfishness. To start looking out for oneself. And this is where we need these valfis, to bring back memories, good or bad but equally satisfying, to bury grudges, to absorb that feeling of a second parting from a family we have grown to love and enjoy. Parting from a company of friends, who have been there through thick and thin. The core implies that bonding which is almost too impossible to rediscover. As we look ahead to another chapter in our lives, to times where seeing each other would become harder than cracking an AA in MA, to tales that shall be regaled in silver jubilee reunions, we need that emancipation from our second family. And this is where valfis come into the picture. Although it could be done with less gaalis and investigations into a crush on a girl in class 11th, it is a moment to be savored.

From an album produced for a friend: